I would like to continue with our Blog and move into a category I like to call “The Invisible Weight.”
While studying Heartmath, I learned your heart is a muscle and muscle has memory, hence why we feel at times our heart is breaking (emotionally).
But know that grief doesn’t just live in the heart: it settles into the body, into the bones, into the quiet moments when you’re trying to remember how to breathe. For many, the aftermath of death brings with it an invisible weight – a heaviness that isn’t always seen or understood by others. It shows up in the fatigue that lingers for months, in the difficulty concentrating, in the way joy feels out of reach even in moments that once would have brought laughter.
There’s also the practical weight – the one that comes with having to make decisions when you’re numb. Paperwork, wills, belongings. All the physical pieces of a person’s life reduced to things that need sorting. There’s something achingly cruel about that….the way the world demands productivity from the grieving.
And then there’s the emotional labor being strong for others, keeping traditions alive, trying not to fall apart in front of your children or your parents. You become a caretaker of grief (yours and theirs) often without even realizing it.
This weight doesn’t have a lifetime, it doesn’t show up all at once, and it doesn’t leave on command. But it is real. And naming it is part of honouring the love behind the loss.
Please understand and know that all of this is normal when dealing with loss and it will continue as time goes on and it will get easier.
Until next time, wishing you peace and warmth.
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